Starting to feel old? Here are some thoughts on feeling old when you’re actually not that old – it can be tough to balance in your mind!
This funny thing happens when you have a kid – you start feeling old regardless of how old you actually are. In my case, it’s exaggerated, since I had my first child at 23. Did you know the national average age for a woman to have her first child is 26? Yeah. I’m a bit of an overachiever. Sometimes it makes me feel isolated – being one of the only people I know my age with a child. My friends from high school and college are still going out and partying, dating around. They’re starting exciting new careers and living in hip cities. I’m (very happily!!!) a married stay-at-home mom living in the suburbs with a mortgage. It can be hard to find things to talk about.
Mostly, I feel out of touch. For example, Alex and I say, “YOLO!” all the time, mostly as a joke, but then we realized the other day that we don’t think anyone actually says that anymore? (Do they?!) Except for us. Because we’re that old couple.
I’ve talked to Alex about this before – about how I feel like an old lady at 25. And he’s made a few good points, like how I’ve always been this way, now I’m just taking care of a kid in addition to it, or how I’m not an old lady, I’m just not the ‘norm’, especially where we live (New Jersey, where the state average sits above 27 for a woman’s first child).
And all of that is true – in college, I did the fun party girl thing for about 2 months before I realized how tired I was. And then I went back to reading books and surfing the interwebs and being just a liiiiiiiittle bit introverted. Even in high school, I never did anything crazy. In fact, recently my dad was asking my brother and me about the things we “got away” with in high school, such as if we ever snuck out. My brother was saying how he went out all the time and my dad never knew. I told my dad that once I left the house at midnight with a friend to get a Slurpee. But I left a note. So, I mean, does that really count?
Every day I find myself feeling old. In most ways, I think it’s just what happens when you become a parent. I mean, bringing in a new generation is bound to make you reflect on your own age in comparison to your offspring. So I don’t really mind it.
Either way, here are some things making me feel like the world’s oldest 25 year old in the world lately:
-The other day I decided to put some jams of for Ryan and me while I made dinner, so I went to the Top 100 in the US station, one that I would have happily sang along to every word of every song a few years ago. YOU GUYS. I knew none of those songs. And even worse, I kept thinking, “WTF is this? Is this really what kids are listening to today?” and “This isn’t even music. It’s just noise.” No, really, these were my LEGIT thoughts. My 16-year-old self hates me.
-I haven’t read a Cosmo magazine in at least 2 years. The magazines I now read are things like: Parenting, Marth Stewart, Good Housekeeping, and Simple Living…
-My wardrobe, which used to be trendy dresses, work clothes, and fancy bras, now consists of comfortable staples and things that won’t hold onto a stain. I couldn’t tell you the last time I wore a pair of shoes higher than flats (though, I refuse to get rid of my beautiful stilettos. They’re hiding at the bottom of a box.)
-When I go places where young girls are, like the mall, I find myself thinking, “Oh, honey, put on some clothes! What would your mother say right now?!” It’s embarrassing.
-I no longer have any idea who the “cool” celebrities are, what the trendy terms are, and I sure as hell don’t understand SnapChat.
-We eat dinner at 5. Almost always. Granted, most moms of young children can say this, I’m sure, since if you want to eat with a toddler who goes to bed at 7, you need to eat before the sun goes down.
-I regularly say things like, “Well, when I was a kid..” or “You know, when we were kids, we didn’t..”
So basically, I’m a huge embarrassment to my age group. But I can’t be the only one, so that’s comforting.
A big thanks to Amanda for letting me Think Out Loud!
Tell me – what was the last thing that made you feel old? Did you do anything fun and crazy as a kid? Leave it in the comments!
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