Happy 3rd of July! If you’re in the US I hope you’re having fantastic weather for your holuday weekend – it’s been pretty perfect here in NJ!
Today I’m stopping in to give you all this month’s Advice Found! I’m so happy I started this series because I LOVE the well-thought out, insightful advice you all leave in the comments! It’s so interesting for me to see all of the different opinions on a topic and each time I learn so much and leave with a lot to consider.
This month’s topic was Kids and Money! To get the full post which had my own take on the topic as well as the general question asked, head over to this post! Below you’ll find some of my favorites from the comments section of the last Seeking Advice. You can see all of the comments as well as my take on the issue on the post, “Seeking Advice: Kids and Money” I’ve linked the names to that person’s blog if applicable and would love it if you’d stop by their site and see some of what they’re about!
I just want to say: you all are amazing. The insight you give on each topic is just fantastic, and this month I learned so much and, as always, left with more questions that I started with (in a good way!)
Advice Found: Kids and Money
Alexandra from My Urban Family:
“I grew up doing chores with no allowance but my parents were fairly open about money and how it was semi tight when I was growing up. They gave me some spending money if needed, but I also starting babysitting fairly young and liked not having to ever really ask my parents for money. As soon as I hit 15 I had multiple jobs. I did have a grandma who paid me for good grades for a few years but I always got straight A’s and took more classes than she was originally thinking so that quickly ended HA. My husband on the other hand didn’t do a single chore unless he was being paid for it which I personally think is an awful way to raise a kid – I don’t like the idea of “you only work/help out if you get something for it” but I know he doesn’t exactly see it that way. I’m sure we’ll have to chat about what we want to do more once we had kids.”
Heather from Polyglot Jot:
“I grew up doing chores and helping out but was never given an allowance or money for doing those things. They were just things that we were expected to do to help out. I never got money for good grades, but my parents would take me out to dinner or let me pick take out of my choice for good grades.
I agree with the using money for memories. I think thats what my parents were teaching me with letting me pick out dinner.
I think to teach a child about saving, you can turn it in to a game. While they’re playing store or house you can aid in teaching them about money. When I would get birthday money from family, I would save it up and then when we went on vacation, my parents would help me to decide what I would use my spending money on.”
Gretchen from GretchRuns:
“My childhood sounds really similar to yours! We had chores as kids too and if we did everything for the week we would get paid. For good grades my parents took us out to dinner, and whoever had higher grades got to pick to place. We had to make high honor roll to go! Once I turned 16, I was also expected to get a job. When I got paid, my parents made me save half of it and got to keep the other half. At the time I hated that but now I think it was great to learn how to save money and realize you can’t just use up all the money you get! My parents also had me help them meal plan and cut coupons on the weekend, so now I’m big about saving money at the store.”
Ellen from My Uncommon Everyday:
“My parents started giving me a very small allowance when I was about 2, so that if I wanted a millionth Barbie, I had to learn to save and buy it myself if I really wanted it (with birthdays and Christmases being the exceptions). I learned I could buy more Kelly dolls than Barbie dolls, and I learned how to gauge how much I really wanted things. This extended into unnecessary extra clothes I wanted as I grew up, and pretty much anything that wasn’t needed. I paid attention to sales and coupons starting pretty young because of this. I’m still (mostly) a saver rather than a spender.
I was never paid for chores, but I was expected to do them. Chores were part of being a family member, not anything incentivized.
I was never paid for grades, though I definitely asked why when I had classmates getting $50 for straight As. Good grades were also pretty much expected. That said, my parents didn’t obsess about my grades (I did enough of that), and they didn’t want me to feel penalized if for some reason my grades weren’t as good as I hoped. I did get to take report cards to Cheryl’s Cookies and get half a dozen free cookies and Limited Too for 10% off ?
My parents didn’t expect that I had a job, since I was more than busy with school and extracurriculars; they just told me that school was my job. I recognize that I am extremely fortunate to be able to treat college the same way, and just work in the summers.
So, that was really long. I think getting an allowance from such a young age helped me learn to save money, and that’s a habit I still have today. When I do want to make a big purchase, I still usually talk to my parents about it. I wholeheartedly agree that investing in experiences and memories is a valuable lesson, and that’s something I focus on a lot now.”
Jessie from The Acquired Sass:
“My plan…because I wish this had been done with me is this :
Certain “chores” are expected…cleaning your room, clearing your spot at the dinner table, picking up your things from around the house + a few other age appropriate things. That’s how you pay “rent” for living in the home & earn your keep, contribute to the family. But, the fridge would have an ongoing “jobs for hire” section where chores & their dollar value would be posted. Kiddos could earn as much or as little $ as they wanted by doing some extra chores. Cutting grass, doing laundry, making dinner, cleaning the bathroom.
I love the idea of helping them divide their money into spend, save & donate categories. Occasionally, growing up, if my Dad knew I was working hard to save my allowance for something, he would offer me mini challenges. He once offered to pay me a quarter for each country I could name over 15 countries. And that was a bad mistake on his part, ’cause I raked in the big bucks!
We were never paid for grades, but we definitely drove around collecting all sorts of free stuff, ice cream, Krispy Kreme used to give you a free donut for each A, which meant my brother & I could usually get a dozen between us!
I think, overall, it’s super important to be open about money. Why you can or can’t afford something, or why you could afford it, but it might not be a smart option as it would prevent you from affording something else. And I agree. I remember the memories my parents helped me make way more than I remember any gift I ever received!”
Heather from Lunging Through Life:
“I got a job when I was 16 and have always worked. I did get an allowance, and I want to say it was until we had our own job? I’m not sure. Of course my parents helped out when needed, but we had chores around the house as well. I definitely plan to incorporate chores. Kids need to grow up learning how things are run- like you take toys out, you put them back. We always cleaned the table and did dishes after dinner. My parents instilled in us early how we need to take care of our stuff and what we were expected to do- so we kept doing it. We weren’t necessarily told to do it but still to this day, we clear the table and do dishes when we are at their house. I agree with Julie, above, that you get the allowance unless you didn’t do the chores or did something you shouldn’t and then reevaluate on that. But, jobs for sure. Kids need to learn responsibility!”
Stefani from The Crafty Christian:
“Growing up, I was always working. Our family had money, but they didn’t buy everything for us. I started babysitting at 9 or 10, and then got a dish washing job at 14, and then a retail job at 16. I had to buy my first car ($500!), and pay for my cell phone. I even had to pay for college on my own! But it definitely taught me responsibility. We plan on doing something similar for our boys. My husband actually used to work for Dave Ramsey, so we have plenty of books and ideas to work into raising kids that are smart with money! ?”
Kristy at Southern in Law:
“I never got pocket money/an allowance as a child but my sister did (second children get ALL THE THINGS!) and I’m kind of in two minds about whether or not allowances are a good thing!
I don’t know if it’s a personality thing, but I have always been the saving queen. Whenever it was my birthday or Christmas and I got money from relatives, rather than spend it on toys I’d save it up – either for spending money on our next vacation or to buy a bigger toy – or just to see my little dollarmites bank account grow ?
My sister on the other hand? She spends money like it’s burning a hole in her pocket and is lucky if she has more than $1 in her bank account. She’s 21 and will still ask my parents for money because she knows they’re suckers and will give it to her ?”
^^ First child problems are so real!!!
Emily at Beauty in Christ:
“First of all, I LOVE that you are talking about this, because I think my parents put a lot of emphasis on saving money, BUT they also are super generous, so when it came to giving to others, giving to each other, and sharing our resources. If we wanted to share with someone, they never put the ‘kabosh’ on it. (hehe…) When I was about 7 or 8, my parents gave me an allowance, and I Think they did put an emphasis on how we spent it. I agree with Ellen that receiving that allowance actually taught me to be careful and more responsible with money rather than my parents always paying for our things.
I wasn’t technically paid for chores, but it was kind of just an ‘extra’ allowance, almost like a gift from my parents, every few weeks, so I didn’t connect the allowance with what I did around the house, which, for me was a good thing, because now, I love to work without connecting it directly with always having to make money.”
I really do want to thank each and every one of you who take the time to comment and leave such well-thought out comments on these posts – it means SO much to me that you are helping me make this series a success. You are all so thoughtful and respectful to one another, occasionally starting conversation in the comments and leaving your own experiences to help me and other!
The Seeking Advice for July is going to a really good one that will make you all think AND that effects each and every one of you, parent or now – so be sure to keep an eye out for it!
Have a great rest of your weekend, everyone!!
So tell me – who’s advice did you identify the most with? Who’s made you think the most? If you missed adding your advice but have something great to say on the topic, leave it in the comments!
Don’t forget to check out the past Seeking Advice posts!