Sometimes we find ourselves losing patience with kids, no matter how hard we try. By taking simple steps and having a bit of a mindset shift, you’ll be able to control your patience and confidently move out of your mom overwhelm.
I’m going to admit something a little taboo right now.
My kids annoy me.
As mothers, we often feel we’re not supposed to really admit that. Our children are the lights of our life, our everything – right?
But often, I find myself wondering, how could something so precious be so, so irritating? If you’ve ever lived with a toddler for a day, you know exactly what I’m talking about.
How to Stop Losing Patience with Kids
While I’m no expert, I’m sharing my best tips for how to keep your cool when it comes to kiddos driving you nuts.
Think of the reason behind it.
These questions can really help you pinpoint why you’re feeling on edge. Sometimes the issue isn’t so much your kids, but you. Being extra stressed, tired, and/or worn out, will inevitably contribute to your inability to keep your patience.
Sometimes just pinpointing this fact itself can often help me regain some semblance of control.
How to solve it:
Brainstorm your normal stress triggers at a time that you’re not already stressed. Then use those to weed out your problems. For me, lack of time to myself, sleep, and hunger are my main triggers for stress.
Focusing on getting more sleep, asking for alone time, and planning snacks to avoid getting hangry can help,
Drop all non-essentials.
The fact that you are losing patience is not the fault of your children. We all know that.
Chances are you are stressed and overwhelmed and trying to do more than you need to. By dropping all non-essentials in your day, you are able to relax a little more, pay more attention to your kids, and be a better mom all together.
How to solve it:
Make a list of what you NEED to do versus what you FEEL like you need to do.
The NEED to do list should look basically like: keep everyone alive and safe.
The FEEL like you need to do list will have everything else on it.
Take a minute to yourself
As human beings, we all need some time to ourselves.
Having kids, especially toddlers, can make that hard by default. Someone always needs something. And when they don’t need things, there are messes to clean, food to make, baths to give, etc.
Feeling like you have zero time to yourself can make the constant chatter of you 6 year old sounds like nails on a chalkboard. The suffocating nature of having zero time that is meant for you and you alone can make you lose patience with your toddler in an instant.
I know personally, it’s the main culprit.
How to fix it:
FIND time for yourself. MAKE time for yourself. Don’t be afraid to tell someone you need help and you’re not superwoman. If you can, take a shower. Take a nap. Go to the store! Use nap time as you time, rather than time to clean/make calls/do laundry/whatever. Whatever time you can give YOURSELF will reflect your mood in such a positive way.
Know that tomorrow is another day. Whether you’re having a bad morning or you’re looking back on a long AF day, tomorrow you can try again.
Know that tomorrow is another day
Can we all stop being so hard on ourselves? Let’s face it – being a mom is rough. Being a mom in a world where we’re expected to be completely enamored with our children at every moment of every day? Impossible. Know that bedtime will come. That tomorrow is another day, another chance to start over. You are not alone in feeling this way. Let go of your mom guilt, please.
BONUS TIP for patience with children:
If you find yourself regularly losing patience with your kids, try making note of what was going on each time. Even just in a notepad in your phone.
I realized recently that I most often lost it when I felt I “had” to make a complex dinner, so on days I know that it’s just not working, I’ll make something simple like grabbing a taco kit and doing tacos or simple boxed mac and cheese.
So tell me – when was the last time you found yourself losing patience with kids? How do you handle it? Let me know in the comments!