Yesterday, I woke up and realized that in 3 weeks Ryan will be 3. The time – where has it gone? I have no idea. This time last year I was coated in an ever-present layer of spit up and trying to sneak in a few minutes of sleep between naps. (some things never change) I was a mom of 2 under 2 and thinking that I must be legitimately insane for thinking this was a feasible thing.
And, of course, I was wrong. I survived. Both kids made it through alive and well and happy, as did I. And Alex. And our marriage. We all made it out of the first year intact. Thinking back has really made me think about what I would have done differently. I’m one of those people who don’t believe in regrets – I think everything happens for a reason. But even with that in mind, it’s hard not think about what I would tell my pre-baby self. When I first got pregnant with Ryan I knew absolutely nothing about babies, so the mere thought that I would be a mom in (less than) 9 short months was baffling. I had no idea what to expect and I’m sure it showed.
With this in mind, today I’m sharing some of the things I would tell my inexperienced self before having babies.
This review was made possible by iConnect andLuvs. I was provided compensation to facilitate this post, but all opinions stated are 100% mine.
It will feel hard, but it’s not impossible. Oh, poor, naive, pre-baby Morgan. You’ve never held a baby. You’d never changed a diaper. Hell, you’ve never even pulled a real all-nighter. But don’t worry, it’s coming. What you don’t know is that the precious little you’re being blessed with will have horrible colic. He won’t sleep. He’ll cry a lot. He’ll only take a boob to calm down. You’ll spend 90 minutes rocking him to sleep only to have him sleep for 15. You’ll question everything. You’ll cry. You’ll pick fights. You’ll fall asleep in weird positions.
I wish I could go back and reassure myself of that. There were nights that I remember crying alongside Ryan, begging every deity I could think of to please, just let him sleep for more than 20 minutes. I wish I could reassure myself that yes, this is hard, but it too shall pass. People told me that, but man, when you’re in the thick of it, it seems like it will never end.
The second one will be easier. I worried so much when I was pregnant with Owen about Ryan feeling neglected. I worried about having the colicky nights all over. I worried about Ryan missing his mommy while I was in the hospital. I worried about him not wanting a brother. I worried so much, and for the most part, none of it happened. Ryan transitioned to much easier than I expected him to. It was so much easier than I thought. You’ll adjust. Your family will adjust. Room WILL grow in your heart. All of the baby knowledge will come back to you. It will be easier this time – you know what to expect. And while it’s never the same experience twice, it’s safe to say that you’ll do well this time around – just like last time.
It’s okay to ask for help. If I could have learned this 3 years ago, it would have been nice. I think it’s the one piece of advice I needed to hear then. I mean, I still need to hear it sometimes, to be honest. But here’s the thing – no matter how many people tell you this, you need to learn it for yourself. SO many people told me that having ‘me’ time or asking for help was no big deal, and while I wanted to believe them, some little nagging thing inside of me told me that I had to do it all myself. That I was less of a mom if I didn’t. That I didnt have anything else to do so why do I need help?! <– I laugh at that one now.
But he truth is, we all need a little help now and then. Not asking for or accepting help only hurts you in the long run – you’ll be more worn out, more exhausted, more unhappy. If I could go back, I would tell myself to accept help as soon as I could.
I still struggle with forcing myself to accept help – I think of every excuse under the sun to force myself to keep everything on my own shoulders. One of my biggest excuses was the ‘hassle’ of getting everything together. It was ‘easier’ to just keep them with me and handle it. So to get around that, I created a little bin to keep at my dad’s house to encourage myself to let him watch the boys more – no more excuses! Making a ‘grandparent’ kit is perfect for when the grandparents watch your kiddos because you don’t have to pack a bunch of stuff and check and re-check multiple times, stressing yourself out. I mean, sending the kids to Grandpa’s house is supposed to be LESS stressful, right? Here’s what I keep in my ‘Grandparent Bin’:
Diapers for each kid
A change of clothes for each kid
A pair of pajamas for each kid
Diaper rash cream
Non-perishable snacks (something simple, like pouches)
Bottles if using
Essentially, the basics but without having to lug them back and forth. Also, you might want to store some toys there if the grandparents don’t already have some. My dad has a bunch of brother’s old trucks at his house and we bring toys that don’t get enough love at our house over to my MIL’s house for when she watches them.
“This review was made possible by iConnect andLuvs. I was provided compensation to facilitate this post, but all opinions stated are 100% mine.
Don’t buy into the hype. (literally) It’s no surprise to anyone that parenting can be expensive. When you’re pregnant and doing all of your ‘new mom’ research, you can easily get sucked into the giant black hole that is ‘baby stuff’. We all want our kids to have the best of everything and it can get expensive.
One thing I wish I hadn’t bought into? The myth that the ‘expensive’ diapers were better in some way. I consistently bought one of the ‘main’ brands for Ryan when he was a baby thinking they were in some way better. I mean, everyone was using them so that means something, right? On a whim, one day I bought Luvs diapers because they were on sale (on top of their cheaper price). I won’t lie – I didn’t have high hopes. For some reason, I thought the more affordable diapers wouldn’t work as well, would leak, would be uncomfortable – whatever.
I was wrong. These diapers are honestly great, you guys. I’ve talked (complained) about how Owen is impossible to change because he moves around so much. Luvs have helped SO much because they feature large refastenable stretch tabs that create a perfectly snug fit each time without having to mess around. Each pack features cute designs and the diapers themselves are super cotton-y and soft. Both boys are known to get really bad diaper rash due to their super sensitive skin but I haven’t encountered this at all with Luvs.
Most importantly, Luvs feature Super Absorbent Leakguards and NightLock Plus™, its largest absorbency area ever. I don’t know about you guys, but there is nothing worse than picking your kid up and realizing their little booty is wet from an icky leak and a failed diaper. Even though my boys both will gladly sit in their own filth quietly until I notice, I am glad to report I have NOT had a leak since we switched over. Uh, yes. Yes, PLEASE.
There is a reason that Luvs are the diaper of experienced moms – because by the time you hit baby number 2, the new mom fog has lifted and you can see through all the smoke and mirrors. Luvs are simply good diapers – no gimmicks. And now you can head to coupons.com to grab a $1 off any pack coupon!
If you’re still on the fence, here’s my favorite part – Luvs offers a money back guarantee. That’s how much they believe in their diapers: They’re willing to pay you back if you don’t agree. Head over to luvsdiapers.com for more details.
Okay, so tell me – what do you wish you could go back and tell your mom-to-be self? Let me know in the comments!
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